put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize