she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Are we still banned from the library?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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