Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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