It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
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He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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