Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
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I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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