U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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