I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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