So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
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and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
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I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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