And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
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Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
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Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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