Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
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Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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