we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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