I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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