I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize