I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize