her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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