I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
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Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
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We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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