It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
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