Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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