Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize