Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize