Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize