dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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