I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
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I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize