Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Randomize