I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize