So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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