Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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