my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize