Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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