If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize