So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize