Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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