I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize