I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
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Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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