I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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