Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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