They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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