fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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