Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize