is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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