I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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