And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize