hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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