You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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