I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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