Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
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I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
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Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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