Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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