Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize