Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
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