Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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